if you’d rather listen to me read this, click here.

nature. it is the most beautiful chaos you’ve ever witnessed. she’s why we come here, get in these meat suits and do this jig. somehow, the enjoyment of her beauty outweighs the pain of her chaos.

[well… that’s a matter of perspective, i’m certain many cannot see it that way.]

humans are nature. human nature is wild, unpredictable — chaos. you are capable of playing a wildcard at any moment on any day. regardless of how predictably robotic you have become, you are still a wild human and capable of giving a surprise bite.

human nature is also aligning your vibe to go with the tribe — there is beauty in the order, there is safety in the predictability, and support in the deeply rooted human connection.

however, the more humans in a tribe, the more rules put in place to follow, the more expectations, obligations, and social norms — the bigger the bull and the smaller the china shop.

in addition to governing rules, there are unwritten social rules between two people. rules are established as the relationship grows, as unwritten expectations are not met, as we learn and unlearn about each other and ourselves. every relationship between two people has a list of these unwritten rules. and one list does not apply well to everyone.

inevitably, with all these rules, expectations, and obligations chaos will ensue. humans cannot meet all rules, expectations, and obligations. one wild human, no matter how closely connected to another wild human, will act in a wildly human way and it will surprise and disappoint the other.

an unconscious human, is pissed to have to eat disappointment soup while a conscious human, smells, tastes, and swallows the soup taking in what went into it and how it was made for future reference.

in really big tribes, all the governing rules and social norms can really help life run smoothly within the masses. but . . . chaos remember . . . governing rules and social norms can also push hard up against our wild human nature and mass chaos is the result. not all animals do well in cages. we all have the capacity for our wild nature to rise up and push back.

the human gift is our consciousness. we can use our consciousness to make order of things, even to make order of chaos. but . . . consciousness is like a cup you fill up over time. the more you become aware of, the more the cup fills. but this isn’t like the heart cup that fills up when you are experiencing something soulful. this is not the kind of cup that can overflow. this cup is mostly empty, for most people, most of the time.

a conscious human sees this life as a beautifully-wild adventure guided by free-will. an unconscious human is the victim, taken against his or her will, dropped into the hunger games arena, and is now being forced to play survival of the luckiest, cleverest, and fittest.

consciousness collects knowledge, collects dots, then by connecting dots we make order. knowledge is order. connection is order.

what is the root of order for wild humans? words. words create order. words bring order to the conscious knowledge in your mind. and when those words are received by someone, dots are connected, and more thoughts and words spring up growing from the conscious connection and sharing of words.

one difficulty for wild humans is, having feelings and emotions makes creating order — or finding words — very difficult. sometimes the words fly out like bats exiting a cave, but more often than not, for most people, words get bound up within, buried beneath every thought and emotion that have yet to be processed into conscious order — your own personal landfill of thoughts, feelings and emotions left for your unconscious mind to stew in.

i find that making time to write keeps me processing things. i will journal, write letters i never intend to share, and write letters i fully intend on sharing. i write down quotes i like and write what comes to mind about the quote at the time. the more i write the more i open and reopen doors enabling me to fill up my consciousness cup. if you write it, you can come back and read it. you can stand upon it and either grow from there or write about it again to lay a thicker foundation down over a rocky start.

you are — your mind, your being, your body — you are landscapes, infinite landscapes. your consciousness cannot see all of you, you are too vast, too overwhelming, too beautiful for a single consciousness to take in 🙂 — but if you share your story, share your wildness, and those words are received, a deeper connection is made. the more connections, the more you fill your consciousness cup with what you have learned and stand upon.

however, not all words enable connection. not all words will resonate between beings. free-will to create and share words opens the door to chaos, but consciousness gives rise to acceptance and a conscious mind is capable of taking nature into consideration to accept disagreements or differing perspectives.

nature is the beauty and the chaos that lives in vast landscapes. consciousness makes order of this experience so that you live on to bear witness to more beauty, and more chaos. and the more you fill your consciousness cup, the easier it will be to understand nature — that somehow, the enjoyment of her beauty outweighs the pain of her chaos.